Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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