I'm going to jail i love you
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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