Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize