I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Threesome in a minivan. New low
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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