She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
The feeling are messing with the penis
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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