I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
