We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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