How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
