Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
