Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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