Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize