i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
