ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
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