big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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