i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
