i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
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