Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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