there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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