Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Randomize
