My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
