lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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