I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
