But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
