umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Randomize
