she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize