my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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