Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Little spoons don't ask big questions
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
