3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
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I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
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I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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