some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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