oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
