North Korea, Best Korea!
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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