How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize
