The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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