I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize