yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
