I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
