My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
