My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED