I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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