Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Randomize
