Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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