she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
