Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
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