Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
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Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
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Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
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