So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize
