found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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