You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
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