Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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