i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I have already put on my inside pants.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
