Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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